I didn't mean to!
I know I've been gone forever. Really, the biggest reason is that for the past 3 weeks, I've been preoccupied with something I just can't blog about because it's sooo identifying. But! It's a joyous thing that has made my life better--and it has eased some of the pain from the tragedy I went through a few months back that you might remember. If you want to guess, or you can't bear not to know, then email at cutejewess@gmail.com rather than guessing in comments. Has nothing to do with boys, job, family, etc.

But yes, in the meantime, I've dated 3 dudes. And I've had 3 other dudes disappear. That's a lot of blogging to do! And also...I'm supposed to see OS this weekend. Will it actually happen? I don't know. What will happen if it happens? I don't know. But it will be the first time we've hung out since the whole heartbreak, and the thought of seeing him again puts a smile on my face. (Yup! I still delete comments about how sure you are that I'm ruining my life by inviting OS back into it. I delete you, judgy commenters certain of your omniscience!)

The three disappearing dudes:
1) Edgy. We had a good date ages ago; he's sexy and fun. The next day he instantly facebook-friended me. We emailed and texted every day for a while--most often with him initiating! But then one day I texted him and he never texted back. So a couple days later I emailed him, and nothing. There's no figuring this one out, so I won't even try.

2) Sweet Stocky. I'll call him that because he has such a sweet smile, and we had quite fun emails. According to his pics, he's shorter and stockier than most of the dudes I date, but still really cute. He left me a lovely voicemail message in which he said he was interested in talking in person to that cute girl he was emailing. I called him back and left a message, and then nothing. I emailed him a few days later, and nothing. Erm...?

3) Tweener. Remember 'Tween? Again with this one--after our first date he kept texting me. In fact, once while I was out with Loverville and another friend, he texted that he couldn't wait to be kissed by me again. Never heard from him again.

The dudes I dated:
1) Quiet Risk Taker: QRT was somewhat reserved, perhaps shy, but was also a bit of a dare-devil. We had a perfectly nice date--one of the more enjoyable ones I've had lately--but there just wasn't any spark for me. If I had been inviting at the end, I think he would have called for another date. But no harm, no foul.

2) FEGGELEH. Oy. This guy had such cute pics! Oh, he seemed adorable. We spoke many times on the phone, and he seemed very eager to impress. This actually soured me toward him a bit, because he had that "I'm a comedian! I'm going to be so funny for you!" vibe that you sometimes get when someone's trying too hard. But I thought if I turned out to like him in person, I'd consider it endearing. When we met...ick. He kind of looked like his pics, but his body language and mannerisms were completely different than what I expected. He had a bit of Woody Allen in him, mixed with what I can only describe as a kind of gayness. Don't get me wrong--I love gayness. But I don't want to date it.

3) Crazy Politico. Oh, Crazy Politico. This was one of the worst jdates I've had yet. He seemed so interesting--cultured! Creative! Well-educated! But CP spent much of the date trying to convince me how right the war in Iraq was, then vehemently debated other hot-topic issues trying to convince me how his viewpoint was the only valid one. Finally, after over an hour of moralist diatribes, I asked him honestly and frankly--without malice in my tone of voice, "Is this how you usually are on dates? Because I don't think I can take it." He then said he wanted to burst into tears.

And then he ordered another drink.

Since I didn't feel right saying, "Are you crazy? Can't we just end this!?" I sat there, steering the conversation away from politics and other volatile issues as much as possible for about another half an hour.

Okay--next!?

I'll try to be back on a more regular basis!
You know you love me xoxo
***I just felt like ending on a Gossip Girl note :-) ***