I'm in my favorite blogging mode: With a glass full of wine and a head full of stories!

Oh, there's so much to tell. I've been composing blog entries in my head for weeks now, while waiting for the subway or walking down the street. "What a good entry this would make!" has crossed my mind way too often for me not to tell you what's going on.

But I'm in a conundrum--where to start!? Chronologically? Because that would be the best way for you guys to catch up. But for me? Well, I'm dying to tell you about the last guy, the one I'm most excited about...I wonder if that might have to wait for tomorrow, though.

Let's step back a bit, and I'll bring you up to speed on my last 3 jdate guys. The first one we'll call Hell No (a name, you might imagine, conjured up in retrospect). So, Hell No and I had emailed a bit, but mostly we tried to find each other to IM when we were both online. He's a great IMer--witty, quippy, fun. At least on the internets...

I was going to be Hell No's last Jdate for a while, he told me. He'd grown disillusioned with the whole thing. Said it wasn't going the way he'd wanted. Now, I've been told this by guys before. Usually it means the guy considers the woman not to be what's "advertised." So I assumed this was what Hell No meant. She doesn't look like her picture, she can't hold a conversation, etc.

When I saw Hell No, I reconsidered that assumption. First of all, his profile pictures must have been 1) years old, and he's not an old guy, and 2) taken in light sent down from God's eye itself. I would never have recognized him. But still, what about the witty conversation, right? Ummm, no. He was sarcastic to the point of being actually rude. He insulted my interests, and when I said--not only politely, but actually interested--"Ok, so what are your interests?" He responded: "I have no interests."

Really? Really, buddy? I looked at him quizzically. He said, "There must be things I do, but I forget them in an interview situation." Yeahhh, it's called conversation, homeslice. I basically wound up telling him the date should end, and he agreed impolitely. He was nearly mean to me most of the time.

Note to Hell No: When you look completely different than your picture and you are unable to hold civil conversation, my guess is that yeah, Jdate ain't gonna work too well for ya.

Soon after Hell No would be Sweet Square. We'd also had great email conversations--such a fun back-and-forth. In person, he was much more reserved. But I used to be like that on a first date, too, so I didn't think much of it. Something about him grew on me throughout the date. He's not knock-out handsome, but he was cute, in a square kind of way. This is not a carefree individual, but he had a good sense of humor, and an earnestness about him I liked. When he walked me home, we had some great kissing goodnight. At one point, he even exclaimed "Wow."

From then on, we were email dating. Every day, all day, we'd trade flirty messages. Some of what he wrote me was just so sweet--the kind of stuff you hope a guy will write. It was fun, for both of us, and it got a little saucy! So when our 2nd date rolled around, I had somewhat high expectations. I waited for him to put a hand on my back, or casually touch my knee...something...but in person, again, he was absolutely nothing like his emails. Still, we had a few more kisses when he walked me home, and he asked me out on a third date.

The emails continued. And they were great. We had such a good email relationship! Flirt, flirt, flirt all day long. It gave me the giddy feeling that makes the early days of dating worth it. I kind of hinted that I expected him to be a bit more flirty in person for our third date--very innocuously, and in the spirit of all our emails--and all of the sudden, he got cold. The next day he emailed me that he didn't think we were a good match. The end.

I'm not too heartbroken. I have a tendency to ask "Gee, what's wrong with me?" But this time, I think it's at least 95% him. (And, of course, 100% his loss.) Still, what an odd and sudden about face. I would have waited until after our 3rd date to decide things--but God forbid maybe he would have been expected to put a hand on my arm. Especially after emailing about how much he likes my legs, my figure, etc. Something, besides sitting side by side as if I were rigged with electroshock therapy.

Which brings me to the third guy, whom I went out with the very day Sweet Square ended things. And whose name I have to look up. Because he's a return. From ages ago--longer than many of you will remember. What a dreamy date we had. He's not perfect, let me tell you--but he's smart, charming, successful, funny, seemingly affectionate (although friggin' Rogue from X-Man would seem touchy feely after Sweet Square), and HOT. AS. HELL.

But more on that tomorrow :-)
--Cute Jewess