Saturday, October 13, 2007

Oh for goodness sake. Now I'm having bad luck with Real Live Guys too! Well, sort of.

Last night, Sporty (my girl friend, Sexist Commenter Who Assumed It Had To Be A Guy) and I went out for drinks. Now, Sporty is outgoing when it comes to guys. She's cut to the chase, kiss the guy in a bar, if he's not interested move on to the next. As you know, I am more shy. But around Sporty, with some cocktails in me, I can get a bit bolder.

So last night I spoke to a few guys. 1) Galoomf: I did not find him attractive; he approached me, we chatted for a bit, then he left. I found out that Sporty thought he was cute. I worked some magic to get them speaking--she kissed him. 2) Straight Laced: I initiated conversation, we chatted for a bit, and then a girl came to join him--she was wearing an engagement ring. 3) Retro Cool: Sporty started chatting with Retro Cool's friend, so he chatted with me. I could tell he was interested, and I was willing to give him a shot. After talking more, I found him to be smart, funny, and decent. I didn't think he was the most attractive guy I've ever seen, but he was cute enough to get to know better. Retro Cool walked me home and leaned in for a kiss. I gave him my usual (if rare) Cute Jewess kiss-for-someone-I-just-met: nothing too deep, but enough to show interest.

Retro Cool asked me to lunch the next day. We had lunch, and it was okay. The conversation was good enough, if not filled with instant spark. Again, he seemed cute enough and decent enough to get to know. I'd have gone out with him again. EXCEPT.

Dude works at a major financial institution. And he asked to split the bill.

I'm sorry, but if a guy asks me to split the bill on the first date, it almost always means I will not go out with him again. It just says "cheap" and "ungenerous." Those aren't qualities you look for in a guy. Especially if he works for one of the richest companies in the world! If you treat a girl to a first date, it doesn't mean you'll be treating her for the rest of your dating life together. It just means you're considerate. You're showing her you're a classy guy. Trust me, the bill wasn't even close to large.

So, buh-bye Retro Cool. He leaned in to kiss me goodbye, and I gave him my cheek. He leaned in again, and I kissed him more chastely than when we first met. Will that be enough of a signal that he shouldn't call me? We'll see.

Meanwhile, Adorable Intellectual isn't writing me back. I don't know why--we've had such nice email banter. But he's logged in several times to Jdate now over the past couple days with no word.

That sucks--I wanted to meet that guy.

--Cute Jewess


Best Friend said...

Ugh, retro coll doesn't know how to date.

If you ask, you pay, buddy. that's it.

and if you have it to pay, why weird....

jgo said...

Dont make the assumption that everyone who works for a big finance firm makes the big bucks. I definitely know some who work for big names that dont. That being said, Im sure hes not poor so he should have probably ponied up.

Nice job putting yourself out there though.

Anonymous said...

Ah, men have it rough these days. I think I prefer on early dates to go dutch - maybe he was trained by someone of my school of thought?

In general, though, you're probably right - if he didn't even offer, that's a poor sign.

Cute Jewess said...

Jgo, no matter how much they pay him, it's enough to foot a bill that in total was barely over $30.

And Anon, if a dude does the asking out and then asks to go dutch, I personally think that's totally tacky.

Heather said...

I agree--tacky! Ick! I don't get it. It's one thing if you offer, another to be asked. What's up with dating these days? Is there no etiquette?

Michele said...

I think you should tell retro guy why you don't want to see him again ... maybe in an email because that's always easier but the dude needs to know just how rude it is to ask a girl out and then ask her to split the check.