Tuesday, December 11, 2007

I had to leave an establishment tonight to stop myself from punching a girl in the face. I'm not exaggerating. I pictured my fist cracking this girl's cheekbone, and I wanted to fight her. She was crazy rude and verbally attacked me for 100% absolute no reason. She also physically touched me--and that's when I lost it. The word around the bar was that she was "psycho." But honest to goodness, I'm still feeling gypped that I didn't get to fight the ho.

Now, this is unusual for me. I feel anger, don't get me wrong, like any human being, when someone is being absolutely and appallingly rude. And yes, I have been known to tell those people off. But I haven't been in a physical fight since I was 12 years old. That might have been before I even knew Best Friend, my oldest friend. The dude was a bully. I couldn't stand him. He was so mean to me. And one day, I swung around when he was behind me, and I punched the sucker in the stomach. Hard. He doubled over. And homeboy never bullied me again.

So Rude Blonde Girl From The Bar, don't play with me. Because I will punch a ho. Just not in my friend's bar.

Okay, probably not anywhere. But wow, if this is what dudes feel on a regular basis, then I can kind of understand how fist fights start. So I will go to sleep now. And I will still want to punch that bitch. But yes, I will be glad that I did not.

I may have flicked her in the face. But she started it.

--Cute Jewess


Anonymous said...

That's messed up. She deserved it, but it's a good thing you didn't. We don't want to see you blogging from behind bars for trash like that. People are sue-happy in NYC too.

jody said...

So what did she say/do to you? Or is that going to stay under wraps?

Heather said...

Wow! That's crazy. Good thing you restrained yourself, you don't need that kind of trouble!!


mimi of 'sexagenarian and the city' said...

missing you online, cj. hope things stabilize for you and improve, both the professional and the romantic life. try to imagine yourself as a grandmother, looking back on a difficult period of your youth....i know, i know, it would be nice just to imagine yourself on a few pleasant dates...they will return, and then my fun reading will return also.

Best Friend said...

Berry troo... You have to wait for someone to actually strike (or attempt to strike) before clocking people in the grill if you want to avoid jail or said lawsuit.

I sentence you to listening to Shakira's "Hips don't Lie" 5 times, especially the beginning..."NO FIGHTING!" :-)