Monday, January 21, 2008

Methinks my mojo may be mogone. I've been having less luck on the jdate lately. Either guys aren't writing me back or, in the case of the last 2 who wrote back and seemed totally interested, they just vanish. I do know that the jdate luck goes in peaks and valleys, but I'm ready for a good date one of these days. It's been a while since I was excited about a dude.

Ha. A story: I was at a bar with Loverville one recent night, when she says quietly into my ear, "I know that guy from someplace. Is he on Jdate?" I could only see the guy in profile, which didn't look familiar. "I don't know him," I said. Until a friend of Loverville's brought the guy over. "This is Persistent," she said (well, she used his name, but duh). "He knows he knows you two from somewhere, but can't place where." Instantly, I recognized him. He had hotlisted me, flirted with me, and tried to IM me. And when that didn't work, he just kept "viewing me" every so often. Yup, he was a Jdater. And he'd viewed me enough times that I was sure that at least for me, he knew that's how he recognized me. I'm figuring it's the same for LV.

Later, LV would email me "When I was first talking to him, it looked like you were trying to hide yourself in your drink -- I was thinking, nice try, [CJ], you're going to have to reveal your face at some point!!! ;-)" Indeed, LV was her usual gracious, warm, chatty self. I, on the other hand? Was on the colder side. It's just that if it were me--as it once was, in fact, when I saw a Jdate dude in a bar and knew he'd already not written me back--I'd be practical about the fact that it's just a no-go. (About that, Sporty said that dude had been eyeing me most of the night and I should go over and introduce myself. But come on, he didn't email me back. If he wanted to meet me at the bar, he could come on over his own self.) Anyway, when I finally couldn't avoid Persistent any longer, we had a brief conversation. He exaggerated his reaction to everything I said, as if to telegraph "Look how surprised I am at what you do! I did not at all read it in your profile!" I excused myself to the bathroom, he got the picture, and he went back to his friends.

Afterwards, I was feeling kind of bad. I wasn't impolite, just not especially warm. I felt a twinge of guilt. But both LV and Best Friend (after hearing the story) assured me no guilt was necessary--so I will chalk it up to just not wanting to be entirely inviting.

This next week will be on the busy side, with friends rather than dating, culminating in a birthday party Friday for my friend Dopelganger (he's like the gay male version of me in taste and personality--we love him, clearly). I'm hoping Best Friend will join for that. I haven't seen her in agggges.

Come on, mojo. Don't keep telling me no go!
--Cute Jewess


eH-what? said...

Everything will turn around CJ, no doubt! Is the fact that you ran into a no-go Jdate sort of like "bottoming out",--in the way it can only get better from there? Yeah, going on a bad date I think is worse, but running into a no-go is perhaps a sign that the Jdate wells need a chance to fill up before you grace them with your presence, no?

While on the Harm (my eHarmony moniker) for a scant 5 months, I was matched with 3 people I knew in person (and wouldn't date), somebody I went to school with (but didn't recognize) AND a guy I had gone out with for a mere couple months having met off-line...the world gets smaller and smaller and smaller!

I think your mojo is live and kickin', just on the watch for a good one :)

Cute Jewess said...

Aw, thanks for the pep talk!

Loverville said...

Also: I've found that January is a weird month for dating. People hibernating and such.

Sounds like you have a fun week coming up... enjoy!

mimi of sexagenarian and the city said...

lv is right about january, and feb can be even worse. but why not take a look at you can cast an eye over the guys free, but you have to pay to read the profiles. although there's a lot of overlap with jdate, there are also lots of jewish men who aren't on jdate. it's worth a scan. jdate is very, very small.