Oh man. What to write? This weekend, I saw OS, and all was great at first. But then we went to meet up with his buddies. Now, I've met his buddies before. His buddies love me. In fact, I would spend most of that night talking to his buddies. We'd both been drinking, but I just don't tend to get very drunk. And I think he does. And he's not the most pleasant drunk. Some of the things that were coming out of his mouth just appalled me.
But also, suddenly, it was almost like I wasn't there. Every time I've seen him since our third date, he's been so affectionate. Hugging me, keeping his hand on my leg, giving little kisses. This last time he wouldn't even touch me. So when I put my hand on his back, he said "Wait, are you touchy feely?" I was like, "Dude, you're the touchy feely one." He looked at me like I was nuts. Things just felt awkward, for the first time.
When I told him I was leaving, he pouted. "I'm disappointed," he said. Yeah, you're disappointed because no sex for you, buddy.
One of the things I've really enjoyed about OS is that he doesn't make me feel like I contact him too much. Whenever I text, he's thrilled to hear from me, and responds back right away, usually something cute. If we have plans to see each other, he texts me something like "Lkg fwd to it sweetie." The day after that awkward night, his texts seemed more stilted. When I confirmed our plans, he texted back an "Ok!" instead of a "Lkg fwd."
I have kind of a sick feeling in my stomach. Things might be pretty awkward now, and I dread that. I'm seeing him tonight. What will that be like?
I'm not ready for things to end with OS. I know it's only been about a month, but I've just enjoyed having him around so much. I've enjoyed feeling giddy about him. I've enjoyed his cute as all hell smile, his hugs, just hanging out. I don't fall in "like" this hard very often at all.
As for Hotness? I had fully planned to call him up and end things the day after I was to see OS. But then OS was dickish (we won't yet upgrade his dickishness to douchiness), and so I didn't. But I think things will end with Hotness anyway, in its own time. He used to call and text all the time, and now he's not contacting me very often. And that's fine. I like hanging out with him, but I don't feel much of an emotional connection.
So what will tonight be like with OS? Will he end things? Will things be awkward? Will he be his old self again? Or will he continue to appall me?
I may be very sad tomorrow folks!