Tuesday, May 22, 2007

BCD emailed that he doesn't want to go out again. But I have no idea why. We had such a nice time, and he kept complimenting me all night. I don't get it.

So confused, disappointed, and frustrated.

That's where CJ is today.

Oh, alright. I have an inkling. If I had to guess, I'd say it's because I'm still not so comfortable with putting myself out there physically. It's possible I come across as prudish, which I'm not going to lie, I can be at the beginning of the dating process. But see, once I'm comfortable with a guy, well--it changes. I can become quite the saucy little minx. I know I'm worth the wait. But I should be working on my body language. I must find the happy medium between being "too out there" and too reserved physically. This is something I still must work on. Just when I think I'm getting better!

--Cute Jewess


Eve said...

I am sorry to hear about BCD. Honestly it may not be the physical thing, it might just be that he thought of you as a friend, or maybe he has another girl he is into also. You never know, but either way, you should only do what you are comofortable with, and if you feel reserved physically, then be reserved physically. The right guy will know that you are worth the wait also.

Single Girl said...

Sorry he wasn't feeling the same way you were! At least the guy had the courtesy to e-mail you and let you know instead of just never call or e-mail you again. Don't beat yourself up about it though, you didn't necessarily do anything wrong, you two just weren't meant to be together, that's all. On to the next guy!

Anonymous said...

Would it be crazy to ask him for a little more explanation? Not in a desperate way but in a curious, constructive, let's be friends way.

And don't get too frustrated... What's up with SS anyway?

jeremy said...

Don't go blaming yourself, especially about something like physicality. You had, what, 2 or 3 dates? If a guy likes you he will wait much longer than that. You can only be yourself and sometimes the twain just doesn't meet.

jgo said...

I think it makes you look a little crazy when you try to hard to pry the why after only two dates.

But sorry to hear about this CJ... it sucks but happen sometimes. But this is very common in dating. Usually when I actually like a girl, she doesnt like me or when she likes me, I dont like her. Just keep pressing on.

One thing you mentioned in your post... about putting yourself out there physically. I think thats ones thing that's hard about dating. On a second date I think its usually a bit forward to ask a girl back to your place. It's not the impression I want to give. But at the same time, sneaking in a first time make out session can be awkward in public. But I cant think of anytime where I stopped seeing a girl who I liked just because we didnt get physical so early on. So even though you are making the assumption that this is what happened... I wouldnt beat yourself up over it.

Hope this helps more than hurts.

Anonymous said...

That is what i hate about dating also. You never know why, but what i learned is that there are reasons why i dont like someone, and they are sometimes just a personal preference. Also, as much as we would like to think we know them, we really dont. My ex is on jdate and we still see eachother. You never know what is going on in their lives. So, the last thing we should do is think it is us. It may be or it may not be.

e.b. said...

Wow I have to say I am sort of impressed with his upfrontness. At least he didn't string you along. But it probably still kind of sucks regardless. Onward and upward no need for sucky men! You go get 'em

Dating Trooper - Dating is Warfare said...

Sorry, CJ. It sucks but please don't put any "blame" on yourself - or anyone for that matter! You are not dating to "hook up" but to meet someone who you connect with and want to get to know better (and I don't mean "know" only in the Biblical sense,though that is sure an added perk). The physical stuff comes when it's right between two people, and usually NOT right away. You shouldn't have to "work" on yourself when it comes to what you are comfortable with. Think of Goldilocks and the 3 this guy thought you were not quite right (for who knows what reason...) so keep looking til you find the one who is "juuuust right."
Keep marching Trooper.

a&v said...

Sometimes I have the feeling I come across as prudish, too ... Perhaps we "prudes" are compensating for how saucy we actually are. (We don't want to deal with all the riffraff that'd drift our way if they only knew, right?) ;)

acaligurl said...

i agree with eb, he's upfront. but i guess i'm old school 'cause it seems weird getting a email to end things.
('member the post it note for carrie bradshaw?)